Queen of This Realm - Plaidy Jean. Страница 101
He took me by the shoulders. Why did I allow such liberties? I suppose if one allows them in one direction one must in another. There had never been, nor ever could be, any relationship in my life like that I shared with Robert. I was happy now because he was jealous, because for a time at least he had forgotten Lettice.
He cried: “I demand to know. Are you that man's mistress?”
I laughed at him and he shook me. I was too astounded to answer for a few moments. Then I remembered my dignity.
“My lord Leicester,” I said, “you take great liberties with me. Perhaps I have favored you too much and you have grown to believe you possess powers… even over me. You are mistaken, my lord. I could send you to the Tower in five minutes. Take your hands from me at once.”
He obeyed and stood looking at me, the anger still in his face.
“Are you that man's mistress?” he repeated, almost pleadingly.
“My lord Leicester,” I said with great dignity, “I am the mistress of you all.”
He looked so distressed. He could not bear to think that I had given to another that which I had always denied him. He could always soften me. It was only when he was absent that I could be really angry with him.
“Robert,” I said, “I have promised myself that I shall go to my grave a virgin. I still intend to do that.”
He took my hand and kissed it then and I touched the dark curling hairs at the back of his neck as he did so.
I said gently: “You may go now.”
I COULD SEE now that the farce was at an end. The French had ceased to help Anjou in the Netherlands, so the situation was changing. I would have to come out in the open. A few days after the scene in the gallery, I arose and declared to my ladies that I had had a sleepless night, which was true, for I was deeply anxious as to how I was going to plan the next scene.
When the Duc came to me, I said that I thought I could not endure another night like that through which I had just passed. I had been torn by my emotions and I was going to make the biggest sacrifice a woman had ever made. “I shall give up the thought of marriage for the sake of my people,” I added.
He was dumbfounded and did not know what to say for a few moments. I could understand his confusion. I went on to say that I knew that if I married I would not live more than a few months. My people needed me and for their sakes I would not marry.
It was all such nonsense. No wonder he was bewildered, but when he realized that I meant what I said, he burst into tears and cried out that he would rather we were both dead than not married.
“My dear little Frog,” I replied, “you must not threaten a poor old woman in her kingdom.”
He said: “I meant no harm to your blessed person but I would rather be cut in pieces than not marry you and so be laughed at by the world.”
So that was it. He feared ridicule.
“Alas, alas,” I consoled him. “My heart is yours, little Frog, and now it is broken. But I am a queen and must do my duty.”
“But it has gone too far. Your people know. They accept…”
“I know, little one. Leave this to me. My dear little Prince, how can I let you go?”
Perhaps I went too far for the purple color flooded his angry face. Never had he looked more grotesque; and now there was real misery on his ugly little face; he looked like a poor little frog who has been turned out of a very pleasant pond.
Tears welled up in his eyes and fell down his pitted cheeks. I took a kerchief from my waist and mopped his eyes.
“There! You are a great commander, remember. You will know great glory. I am sure of it.”
In a fit of temper he took off the ring which I had given him and threw it onto the ground.
“English women are like their weather,” he said bitterly. “They are all smiles one day and rain the next.”
Poor little man. He was indeed put out.
I must be careful, though. I still had to think of a French alliance with Spain.
I continued to wipe his eyes, for the tears were still running down his cheeks. Tears of rage, I noted. Poor little Anjou, his mother would say, once again he has failed.
I said: “Perhaps this is not final…”
Hope leaped into his eyes. Could I really keep him dangling a little longer? If I could do that and keep him fighting in the Netherlands, the French and Spaniards would not form an alliance. Was it possible?
He looked a little hopeful. He was clutching at hope, anything rather than to appear to the world as the rejected one.
It would offer him small comfort to know that I had never intended to take him. I had played my part so successfully that I had deluded him into thinking that I would.
“We will talk later,” I said.
Then he left me, his tears dried and a new hope in his heart.
BURGHLEY, WALSINGHAM AND THE rest were amazed at what I had done. Robert was secretly amused, and not surprised, I think. Perhaps he had known me better than the others.
“I have given him hope,” I said.
“He will never believe that again.”
“Perhaps not. But we have to help the little man to regain his selfrespect. Let me see the settlements you have drawn up.”
I took them and said: “There is one clause which must be added. The French must return Calais.”
“They will never do that!” cried Hatton aghast.
“Assuredly they will not. That is why I shall demand it. Only the return of Calais will induce me to go on with the marriage.”
“They would never let us back on their territory even for marriage.”
“Exactly so. That is why we make this a necessary condition. We have kept Anjou in the Netherlands; we have delayed an agreement between France and Spain; and we have gained important time. Our ships are being built in our dockyards. The prospect of that French marriage has served us well. I should have liked to go on with negotiations a little longer, which would have served us even better. But the end is in sight. However, let us be grateful for the help it has given us.”
They were astounded, but I saw the respect in their faces.
Burghley said solemnly: “The people of this country will know one day that their greatest ruler was Elizabeth.”
“In the meantime,” I said, “I shall be very happy with their affection. I believe there is rejoicing in the streets now because the news has leaked out that I have refused the French marriage. No, I do not wish my little Frog Prince to suffer too deep a humiliation. I was in fact quite fond of the little fellow. He was amusing and some of you would do well to learn from his gracious manners. So I am going to offer him money to continue the struggle in the Netherlands. They need help against the Spaniards. They have asked us for it again and again. Well, we will help them through Anjou, and my little Prince can fight our battles for us.”
They were further surprised but I could see the excitement in their faces.
“It will have to be decided how much we can give him. It will have to be substantial. As you know, I am not in favor of Englishmen fighting wars—but I fully approve of others doing it for them.”
I was delighted by the admiration I saw in their eyes … admiration and pride…in me, their Queen.
I looked at Robert, and he was smiling at me.
IT WAS LESS difficult than I had imagined it to be to placate my little Frog.
“Why,” I said, “you have shown us all what a brilliant commander you are.”
I looked at him sharply. Was that too blatant? He had often shown that that was the last thing he had proved himself to be. He swallowed it. He was thinking of his one success at Cambrai.
“My dear little Frog,” I went on, “you are going to prove yourself even more. You will subdue the Spaniards in the Netherlands and come back to us a hero.”
He was already seeing himself feted, riding through the streets of London—a conquering hero. And finally, I should marry him after all and he would be able to laugh in the faces of both his brother and his mother. King of England! I was sure he could feel the crown already on his head.