Послания любви. 365 писем Ошо - Раджниш Бхагаван Шри "Ошо". Страница 17

I want to be rid of it but I cannot be.

What shall I do?

Bankei did not say a word,

just stared deep into the eyes of the disciple,

who began to sweat

in those few heavy minutes of silence.

He wanted to break the silence

but couldn’t gather the courage.

Then Bankei laughed and said: It’s strange!

I searched and searched but could find

no anger within you.

Still, show me a little of it, here and now.

The disciple said: It is not always here.

It comes all of a sudden, how can I produce it now?

Bankei laughed again and said:

Then it is not your true nature.

That remains with you always,

and if your anger had been part of it

you could have shown it to me.

When you were born it was not with you,

when you die it will not be with you.

No, this anger is not you.

There is a mistake somewhere.

Go away and think again,

search again, meditate again.

141. Love.

God purifies in every way.

It is not only gold that has to pass through fire

to be purified

but man too.

For man this fire is the anguish of love.

It is a blessing when this fire enters a person’s life;

it is the fruit of infinite prayers, infinite births.

It is the intensity of thirst that turns finally into love,

but unfortunately few are able to welcome it

because few can recognize love in the form of anguish.

Love is not a throne, it is a cross;

but those who gladly offer

themselves to it attain the very highest throne.

The cross can be seen, the throne cannot –

it is always hidden behind the cross.

And even Jesus hesitated for a moment;

even his heart cried out: Father, why hast thou forsaken me?

But the next moment he remembered and said:

Thy will be done.

That was enough:

the cross became a throne

and death a new life.

In the moment of revolution

between one statement and the next

Christ descended into Jesus.

Your suffering is intense and a new birth is at hand;

be happy, be grateful.

Don’t be afraid of death,

be thankful.

It is the tidings of a new birth.

And the old must die to give birth to the new;

the seed must break to blossom into the flower.

142. Love.

What is suppressed becomes attractive,

what is negated, beckons!

Only alertness to the mind’s games brings freedom.

Negation does not really negate,

on the contrary, it beckons.

The mind plays around the forbidden

like the tongue around the gap of an extracted tooth.

A small shopkeeper in London once caused a sensation.

He hung in his show window

a black curtain with a small hole at the center;

under the hole was written in large letters:

Peeping strictly forbidden.

Naturally, it brought the traffic to a standstill!

Crowds gathered around the shop

jostling one another for a peep through the curtain.

There they saw nothing but a few towels –

it was just a small towel shop

and the shopkeeper had devised this sure-fire method

of increasing his sales.

It worked like magic.

Man’s mind works the same way

and he becomes trapped by it.

Therefore – always be wary of negation,

opposition, suppression.

143. Love and blessings.

Live the truth,

for there is no other way to find it.

Become the truth,

for there is no other way to know it.

You cannot know truth through words,

not through the scriptures,

nor through learning, study, contemplation.

Truth is within, in the emptiness within.

In the state of no-mind,

in the mind free of desires where only awareness is,

there truth manifests itself.

Truth simply is;

it has not to be found,

simply uncovered.

The lid of gold covering it is the ego.

Ego is darkness;

die, and become light!

Where the darkness of the ego is no more

there, in that emptiness, truth is;

and that is truth,

and that is bliss,

and that is immortality.

Do not seek it,

just die and it is there.

144. Love.

I am glad to receive your letter.

Yes, this much suffering has to be gone through –

it is the birth pangs of our own rebirth.

And going back is not possible

for where is the past to which to return?

Time demolishes the steps we climb to reach the present.

There is no going back –

only going forward is possible,

forward and forward –

and the journey is endless!

There is no goal, no destination,

only resting places,

where the tents are dismantled as soon as they are pitched.

But why this fear of anarchy?

All systems are false –

life is anarchic, insecure.

He who seeks security dies before his death.

Why this hurry to die?

Death itself will take care of that for us

so is it not right that we learn to live?

And the miracle is

that death does not call

on the one who learns how to live –

and this alone is needed.

Doesn’t the gardener silently wait after sowing the seed?

Whenever you need me you will find me beside you.

Regards to all there.

145. Love.

Atheism is the first step towards theism,

and a must.

If you haven’t been through the fire of atheism

you’ll never know the light of theism.

If you haven’t the true strength to say No

your Yes will always be impotent.

So I am glad you are an atheist –

something that can be said only by a theist.

So I say: Go deeper into atheism.

Superficiality won’t do,

so don’t just think atheism, live it –

and it will ultimately lead you to God.

Atheism isn’t it,

it is just a doubting.

Doubt is good but it isn’t it.

Actually, doubt is a search for trust.

So go on, make your journey,

for the path to truth starts with this doubt.

Doubt is sadhana

because doubt eventually exposes the incontestable truth.

Inside the seed of doubt is the tree of trust,

so if you plant the seed of questioning

and work on it

you are bound to harvest trust.

And beware all religions!

Only religions obstruct the true path of religion.

146. Love.

Dreams too are true

because what we call truth is only a dream –

it is just the difference between open and closed eyes.

Understand this fully

and then one can go beyond both,

and the way lies beyond both.

Both are the seen and beyond both is the seer.

147. Love.

Not only is a seed a seed,

man is also a seed.

Not only seeds bloom,

man also blooms.

Not only seeds blossom into flowers.

148. Love.

How can the search begin unless there is doubt?

How will the heart awaken to know the truth

unless there is doubt?

Remember – belief and faith bind man,

doubt liberates him.

149. Love.

I was glad to receive your letter.

Make love your prayer now.

Love alone is worship, is God.

Let there be love with every breath –

this is your only sadhana.

Sitting, rising, sleeping, waking

just remember: love.

Then you will see that his temple is not far off.

150. Love.

God is testing you every moment.